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How To Surrender to the Universe (10 Steps)

surrendering to the universe

We often hear the phrases ‘surrender to the Universe’ or ‘release attachment’ but it can be difficult to know exactly how we are supposed to go about this.

Surrender is the act of giving your ideas, goals, worries, fears to something bigger. To trust that a higher power is going to take what you put out and give you something worthwhile in return.

Letting go and trusting the Universe is not easy, in fact, it’s a whole curriculum. We’re always learning more and refining our insights.

In this post I want to share how I have practices surrendering to the Universe over the last few years, and provide some practical tools to help you along the way.

Surrendering to the Universe

1. Acceptance

The first step to surrender is to accept. To accept who you are, what you’re doing and where you are placed.

Acceptance doesn’t mean liking who or where you are – sometimes we’re stuck in old identities and spaces – but coming to peace with it. We’re all trying our best to make improvements, to be better people and be in a better place.

Acceptance lays the right groundwork so that we are grounded and secure in where we are, so that we can move forward in a mindful and balanced way.

A lot of self-help teachings guide us to ignore our current reality, or even pretend it doesn’t exist, I don’t find those particularly helpful. It can feel like lying to ‘ignore the 3D’ or the struggles we are going through.

Often what we need is a deep acceptance and validation of where we are before we can think of moving forward.

2. Gratitude

Gratitude is the most underrated spiritual tool. It is a form of acceptance, acknowledgement, thanks – it covers all parts of the journey, no matter if we are experiencing highs and lows.

Gratitude was a difficult concept for me to understand when I was experiencing my lowest lows. It’s easy to think “Why should I show gratitude when nothing is going in my favor?”

This is why acceptance is the first step. To accept that you have negative experiences, thoughts and emotions and validate them.

We’re spiritual beings having a human experience. We’re going to feel fear and heaviness when faced with obstacles, traumatic experiences etc. or when we are witnessing war and famine. It means we are connected to ourselves and the world at large.

And so, gratitude starts at the most basic level. For water, food, a home, heat, and the list goes on.

The more things we identify to be grateful for, the more things come up in association. Sometimes it can be difficult to stop listing things once you start.

I don’t like to view gratitude (really anything) as something I have to do because other people have it worse, although that can be a helpful mindset for many, but because I deserve to feel gratitude and then be able to extend it.

Once we’ve accepted where we are it’s easier to find ways to show gratitude that don’t feel force. We show genuine gratitude through awareness not force.

3. Meditate

If you do nothing else on this list…meditate. Meditation is a way to clear the mind and start to see thing more clearly.

We can’t move forward if we are bogged down by old stories, or don’t have some consistency building up in our energy.

Meditation is as simple as spending ten minutes in quiet, observing your thoughts but allowing them to flow by.

At first this is difficult because your attachment to them will be super strong, but with practice it’s easier to see how temporary and unhelpful some thoughts can be, and then release them.

Meditation also allows you to hear your own intuition, so that in the process of following any guide or teacher, you can check in and see how to adapt things to fit your own personality and daily routines.

People can help us, but the Universe is ‘looking’ for us! Our ‘goal’ here is to embody our own soul or higher self, not someone else’s, that’s the whole point.

The way we surrender is going to be different to others, and so we have to figure out what that looks like for us. We have to be in the right space to receive the guidance that is for our highest good.

4. Listen to the Universe

Now it’s time to be more active. Before setting any intentions or asking the Universe for anything, just start listening!

When you are going for a walk, quiet the mind down and tune into any intuitive messages. Slow down whenever possible, and practice the pause.

Make space between thoughts, actions, words – when you have a few minutes after waking or before bed, before getting out of the car for work, before eating dinner. Give yourself more opportunities to hear your inner voice.

We can’t surrender to the Universe if we’re not hearing its guidance in the first place.

Spend a few minutes now in reflection, what was the last intuitive message you received but didn’t listen to take action on? How might you do that now?

Having a difficult conversation with someone, researching a location that came to mind, reaching out to a specific person, applying for that job.

Sometimes when we can’t hear our intuition (aren’t feeling guided) it can be helpful to start with an action. Act inspired, act guided and embody the right receptive energy.

5. Go inward

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it” 

Rumi

The reason most of us find it hard to surrender, is because of the barriers that have built up through conditioning and social programming.

Letting go and surrendering was second nature at one point, before the ego formed and we started to take on more and more identities and responsibilities.

Although the Universe can feel far away, as some vague concept, we are one with it. Eventhough it can feel as if we are trying to connect with our intuition, it is already talking to us all the time – we just don’t perceive it.

So one step to start feeling the Universe’s guidance more clearly is doing some shadow work.

This is the process of making the unconscious conscious and understanding your negative beliefs and patterns more deeply.

In doing so you are able to see what is holding you back and stopping you from receiving help and support.

Further Reading: How to do shadow work

Get my free throat chakra + cord cutting guides to help clear your energy.

6. Set an intention

Intentions are a way to let the Universe what we want.

We set intentions through the thoughts we repeat consciously, our speech, through writing them out, and through the action we take.

Once you’ve set a good foundation it’s time to set an intention. Be very clear on what you want and write it down on paper!

So often we keep our intentions in the mind thinking that we’ll follow through on them. But think about how many ideas you’ve had that you haven’t written down and quickly forgotten. The mind is fickle.

Writing our intentions down brings this creative energy down to a physical level, and while not fool-proof, makes thing a little more ‘real’.

7. Take aligned action

You might be wondering “Isn’t surrendering about not taking action?”

Isn’t the whole point that we put our intentions out there and then everything comes to us with ease energetically?

I used to think this way because I misunderstood aligned action. In our everyday lives action is usually rushed and pressured.

We have to clean the house, we have to make dinner, we have to get that job done.

This makes sense on a human practical level, but as we know, spirit doesn’t work the same way.

Aligned action is action taken through our intuition; action that enlivens rather than drains us, because it feeds our soul.

When you set an intention your intuition will start guiding you on the ways you can take this sort of action, align with the right people and put the right energy out into the world.

In the meantime, infuse more intention in your daily actions. Drink your tea a little slower and more mindfully, switch those ‘haves’ in your mind to ‘wants’ where it feels truthful.

8. Let go of expectations

Throughout all of these steps you want to try your best to release expectations. Naturally as we go through this process, we’re going to expect support and guidance to show up.

However, it’s important to realize that the point of these practices isn’t necessarily to receive anything tangible. That will happen, but it shouldn’t be at the forefront of your mind.

It’s ok to have some expectations, we are human after all, but don’t micromanage all of the details. Set an intention, have a goal in mind, but allow things to come into reality in a way that might surprise you. Let go.

Early on in my meditation journey I expected a lot to happen, and it did. I saw a lot of things through my third eye, had out of body experiences, synchroncities were a regular occurrence.

However, equally as quickly, things started to slow down. Suddenly I wasn’t dreaming as vividly or receiving intuitive guidance as I used to – my expectations got in the way!

So, from that point forward I decided I would meditate everyday regular of what would ‘happen’.

Slowly but surely my dreams got vivid again, and my intuition was flowing. I just had to release the expectations first.

9. Pray

I’ve written before about how talking to the Universe changed my life.

“Prayer is talking to God, meditation is listening”

I like to say my prayers like this:

  • Universe/God show me where I am not seeing the opportunities
  • Universe/God show me what I need to do next
  • Universe/God show me what I am not seeing clearly
  • Universe/God show me where I can show more conviction

Sometimes we’ll want to be more direct in what we ask for, if we want a specific thing or experience, but for the most part prayer is all about surrendering to the wisdom that comes through.

Not what we can have all the time but what we can let go of, to make space for the most alignment.

10. Just be

One of the times I felt the most aligned was when I didn’t practice any affirmations, set any intentions or think about future goals.

I simply trusted that the energy I needed would come up in my body. So why have I provided all of these extra steps?

I think some people can very easily step into surrender, just with this final point in mind – just be!

However, not everyone can access a deep level of surrender just with a mindset shift…I certainly couldn’t.

For some people this is a longer process, and for others it clicks right away. Don’t feel disheartened if you are the former. We’re all starting at different places and so our journey is going to wind around the path in a different way.

No one is in alignment 100% of the time, I know I’m not! We are not always going to be in alignment, but there is always a path back to alignment.

Allow yourself to rest, reflect, refocus, as much as you need to to get back into alignment when you feel out of it. When you are feeling tense, heavy, confused, allow yourself to feel these emotions fully before pushing forward.

Why surrender is the key to manifestation

manifestation surrender

Surrender is the key to manifestation!

Manifesting is taking something from an idea in the mind and bringing it into the physical. So, building a house is manifestation, becoming a successful lawyer is manifestation, creating a family is manifestation. We are always manifesting.

However there is a difference between unconscious and conscious manifestation. Conscious manifestation happens when we are aware of our ability to do this most of the time. We aren’t creating based on what other’s want from us, but through what aligns with our soul.

A lot of manifestations point to everything being our own doing – everything we experience is chosen in a sense.

This is not a belief I think is always truthful or helpful. Not every situation in our lives is our own doing, however we have a lot of power!

I like to find that healthy medium where you are acknowledging you have certain preferences, desires, goals, but allowing those things to be moulded and guided by the Universe.

Letting go so that we get what we want but we also get what we need or what our soul is here for.

When to surrender vs take action

If you’ve read this far then I assume you know you need a little extra (or a lot of) surrender in your life.

I don’t feel there is a clear line between taking action and surrender, because we can take action in many different ways.

Taking action in a way that is forced, pressured and with heavy deadlines is obviously not a form of surrender. Anytime we come from survival mode (in energy) we are not surrendering. However taking action that is guided by our spirit can still be firm but is underlined by gentleness.

A good way to figure out which one you are doing is asking if you are moving from fear or knowing!

What I’m referring to here is whether we should take a step back and let things unfold completely uninfluenced by conscious thought and effort, or take the driving seat.

It completely depends on where you are presently (as with most things).

People are are already deep in surrender might need to take some direct, even aggressive action. Lock in, and set clear deadlines.

A lot of the times this is my energy. It’s difficult for me to take action unless I deliberately light a fire under my own butt, otherwise I’ll very happily ‘let things be’ and sometimes this isn’t helpful.

If you find yourself constantly on the go, then you probably could do with some surrender. If you find yourself stepping back all the time, allow things to lead you, you might still need surrender, just a different type.

Surrender that comes from an intuitive space, that is empowering rather than passive.

Surrendering is by no means a passive process. Letting go and allowing the Universe to guide us is not the same as allowing life to toss us around.

Sure difficulties might be thrown our way, but we are anchored and connected to our inner knowing, and so negative experiences only help us realign.

Very broadly speaking, look at whether you tend to be in your masculine or feminine to decide how to proceed and bring balance.

And depending on the season of your life this will shift – whether you take a step back or the driving seat.

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