From the moment we are born we start creating energetic cords with the people in our lives, beginning in the womb with our mothers, similar to the physical umbilical cord.
You could imagine cords extending from your body to anyone you meet or interact with on a day to day basis, however brief, making the energetic transfer of information possible.
These cords run even deeper with family, close friends and romantic relations.
In the case of past relationships many of these energetic cords are still attached years later, becoming active when an old memory is triggered.
In this post I want to go over these specific romantic connections and whether we should cut the cord or do something else.
There are lot of cord cutting techniques that will serves as a temporary fix, but won’t dissolve the energetic imprint completely. Below I’m going to go over how identify an energetic cord, and then how to properly release it.
There’s a lot of debate about consciously cutting cords versus letting cords dissolve in their own time, I wanted to share my own perspective and possibly provide some clarity.
Signs you need to ‘cut’ cords
Before we go into how to let go of energy cords, I thought I’d outline some of the signs that you need to cut them.
- You’re struggling to let go of someone
- They dominate your thoughts
- You have recurring dreams about them
- You feel consistently drained by them
Essentially an energetic (or etheric) cord is a non-physical structure that transfers energy between two people. When a relationship has ended in the physical sense, these cords still linger way longer than you may realize.
An energy cord needs to be released when you no longer want to exchange energy with someone, the connection is draining you or vice versa.
Learn More: I explore energetic cords in the free empath guidebook
Types of energetic cords
There isn’t just one type of energetic cord that we can cut and get rid of, instead each energetic cord will have different properties and be connected to different parts of our bodies.
Most energetic cords are primarily connected at the solar plexus which is where we make a lot of our day to day decisions. This is common in those who have a bond that is based more on practicality than actual love.
I tend to see this connection in people who are in long term relationships but have lost the fire they once had. In this way it is hard to break away, because so many of their responsibilities and decisions involve this person. This is a very common energetic connection.
We also see this type of cord in other types of relationships not just romantic, especially when two people have been making decisions together for a long time. These cords can be even more subtle as we don’t consider them as important or as deep-rooted.
Other cords can be connected at the mind areas, but not very strongly elsewhere. This is usually the case when people are in an infatuation stage but don’t have a strong shared foundation.
I also see this type of cord in people who are highly sensitive but don’t know how to set strong energetic boundaries. They tend to get tangled up in pure mental connection and sometimes fantasy, without considering the practical and physical aspects.
This connection can feel intense at first but will eventually dissipate if the people involved do not connect in a practical way or never move out of the mental infatuation stage.
You may notice these types of cords with people who you haven’t spoken to in years, yet constantly think or fantasize about. This tends to be a one-sided relationship, where one person was more involved in an energy exchange than the other.
Then there are the fully fledged love-based relationships that are quite rare, but potent and easy to spot. This is where we are connected at all chakras centers, strongly at the heart, with a good shared foundation.
I see this connection as being less tangled up, the cords can become more like a shared force field that moves freely. These connections require a lot of mental, emotional and spiritual maturity from both parties involved.
During energy readings I can see why type of cord someone has attached in my mind’s eye and can often feel where the connection is placed on my own body. Knowing what type of cord you have is crucial in knowing how to release it.
How to release etheric cords
There are a lot of exercizes out there for cutting etheric cords, and they might have a temporary effect but ultimately deeper work needs to be done. We can rarely just cut etheric cords and hope they stay gone – it would be like cutting a weed at the top and expecting it not to grow back.
Every connection we have teaches us a specific lesson, and so when we work through this lesson the cords naturally fall away.
The technique below is great at figuring out where your energetic cord is attached, the lessons and emotions that still need to be released, and the work that might need to be done.
- Find a quiet space where you will not be disturbed for ten minutes
- Get into a comfortable position
- Take a moment to close your eyes and take a few deep stomach breaths
- Place on hand on your heart
- Hold an image of the specific person in your mind
- Carefully observe how your body and mind responds
- Observe what words and phrases pop to mind
- See where you feel more resistance in the body
- Breath for a few more minutes and reflect
- Write it all down
With this exercize you’ll be able to pinpoint if your connection was more mental, practical, emotional, or any other variation and work from there. Once you have an idea of what type of cord you are working with you can start the process of releasing it.
With practical relationships it’s a case of creating a more solid foundation within yourself. This will involve doing a lot of lower chakra work with specific focus on the root and solar plexus chakras. Think of it like setting your roots firmly in place, so you do not feel so unbalanced without the presence of the other person.
Look to your physical sense of safety and security, and see where you might need to strengthen these. Observe how you make decisions, and the external voices that you allow to sway you.
For mental connections you want to consciously shift your thoughts away from the person. Every time you fall into a thought spiral or fantasy about them zoom your awareness in and back to your body.
Hold an image of the person in your mind, imagining a cord extending from your body to theirs, and then feel your energy coming back as you take a deep breath in.
Come back to these exercizes as many times as you need to, to identify if the cord still remains. You’ll gradually feel the intensity and length of these energy exchanges decrease over time.