When we think of a soul connection the first thing that might come to mind is the traditional soulmate. A romantic partner who comes into our life and completes us or makes us feel whole.
The idea of the soulmate can be found in almost every culture, whether or not we use that exact same terminology or frame it in the exactly the same way. The idea that there is someone out there that is perfect for us, or that is connected to us beyond the physical is everywhere. We refer to finding the one or the perfect match.
While the legitimacy of literal soul mates is up for debate, there is no doubt that many people find their ‘perfect match’.
However soul connections can be even broader, we can find soul connections with friends, family, our pets, the list goes on.
In this post I want to clarify what a soul mate or soul connection is, plus how to identify one.
What is a soul?
Before we go over what a soul connection is I think it makes sense to discuss what a ‘soul’ is.
In one of my meditations I asked ‘What is a soul’ and got the image of a pair of crystals vibrating at a specific frequency. Some crystals would pull closer together while others would push apart – there was a resonance or dissonance.
I think it’s important to note that when we discuss the soul we are describing something that is far beyond human language and concepts. A soul doesn’t lack anything; it doesn’t need anything to come along and complete it. However our human selves tend to lean that way.
When we get an idea of what a soul is, this can only be taken as a very rough, incomplete idea. When we feel a soul connection this is more accurately with someone’s soul essence: the aspect of a person’s soul which is most truly embodied and integrated.
What is a soul connection?
A soul connection is one that comes without the usual distortion.
A soul connection is one where we see ourselves reflected clearly in another person. They hear and see us clearer, there are less projections. This isn’t to say that soul connections are ‘perfect’ or anything like that, rather that they encourages us to grow rather than devolve.
We are humans after all, no relationship is perfect. We all have wounds, blindspots, varying preferences, this doesn’t go away just because we are connected on a deeper level, it’s just that we move through the differences with more ease and acceptance.
Types of soul connection
There are many types of soul connection and some that you might already be familiar with. The most common and one we’ve already discussed is the soul mate.
A soul mate is believed to be the other half to our soul, someone who completes us in everyway, someone who we are destined to meet in this lifetime. However we have already talked about why this cultural ideal of the soulmate is incomplete.
A soul mate is really someone who reflects our true soul essence back to us. They support us in bringing out our best qualities, in navigating our own stuff, in cultivating self love.
A soul mate is not someone who is literally perfect for us in every single way, but who we can grow with honestly and authentically. The key element of a soul mate connection is that it feels incredibly peaceful and safe.
The next type of soul connection is the ‘karmic partner’. This is someone who you chose to work on resolving karma with in this lifetime.
This soul connection can include any type of relationship, romantic, friendship, familial. These connections can invoke deep healing and transformation like the twin flame connection, however karmic partners tend to leave our lives at a defined point (when the lesson is learned), there isn’t the same chaser and runner dynamic.
Another type of soul connection is the twin flame.
Twin flames are defined similarly to soulmates in that they are seen as one soul split into two bodies, however the difference is that twin flame relationships are much more passionate and fiery. While the soulmate is someone who soothes and calms our spirit, the twin flame dynamic is incredibly intense.
Twin flames push us to our limits, that sparks a deep expansion, transformation and healing. These dynamics are often compared to abusive relationships, where there is a heavy push and pull dynamic with codependency rather than true connection.
Twin flame relationships are discussed as having a chaser and a runner, with the expectation that you’ll have to fight for your twin flame, to keep the connection alive, regardless of how much it hurts.
While genuine twin flame relationships might exist, more often people are mistaking an abusive or codependent dynamic for a twin flame. Particualrly when the attraction is one-sided, using the concept of twin flames as a justification to persistently chase this other person.
Overall I think we get way too caught up in the labels here, especially when talking about romantic relationships. We get caught up in the cultural expectation of finding a relationship which is somehow perfect, that completes us in every way. This can be a spiritualization of this expectation.
Or where we are so set on being with a particular person or justifying unhealthy dynamics that we utilize a spiritual explaination to avoid moving on or letting go.
4 signs of a soul connection
- A familiarity, as if you were reconnecting with an old friend
- An ease and comfortable rhythm
- Time and distance doesn’t hinder the relationship
- There is a intuitive/deeper knowing
The topic of soul connections came up when I did tarot readings more often. We are talking about soulmates, twin flames, karmic partners and other ‘soul connections’.
I didn’t expect to receive so many questions specifically about twin flames, and I learned a lot about this dynamic through the readings I did.
What I found was that a lot of people place far too much pressure on themselves to find a soul connection, and far too many expectations on those who they believe were their twin flame or soulmate.
It’s very hard to not overthink things when you have finding your soul mate or twin flame as a set goal. It becomes confusing to discern where there is an actual connection versus when you just want that connection strongly.
A soul connection is more often than not, a connection that comes with such a natural flow that these labels don’t even feel necessary.
Going into relationships with honesty about our ideals is best for us so that we know what we getting ourselves into, and for others so that we do not unfairly hold them to impossible standards or place them on a pedestal.